Depressed....

Another day, another torture.*sighs*Public Speaking class later...and I don't feel well *cries* been having a realllllllly bad headache since yesterday...haaaaihz.Well, what can I say. I'm tired. I'm bored. And I'm crankiee!!! I want streamyx!! I want my line back at home... waaaaaaah!!! *cries more*I miss IRC man...and I miss my online life. Uh-oh...this is seriously sounding like me being a online-no-life-freak! O____OSomehow or the other, this song lyric seem to be stuck in my mind. The beginning goes something like this:"Loneliness is always looking for a friend..."Song is from MyTown, but I can't remember the entire song. Chey! Ironically, this song suits my temperament right now, considering I'm often alone these days *shrugs* Even more ironic, I don't seem to bother it. Much. True, who enjoys loneliness? But I find me being alone is much more...peaceful. Don't get me wrong, I don't mind having company, but I don't enjoy being with a group of people that has no interest in talking to me whatsovere. Better alone than being ignored in a group,right? *grins*I sound bitter, don't I? Again,oddly enough, I don't feel bitter whatsoever. I am who I am, so why should I change myself for the sake of others? Only if I find myself utterly disgusting and has really weird and bad and irritating characteristics only will I change my personality then. But let me ask you this: Should I really change who I am for the sake of others?When I am in college, everyone tend to ask me, "Where's your friend?" And being such a 'lovely' person as I am, I just reply, "No idea. She's with someone else I suppose." Sounds bitchy? It's a fact man! I can't change it. True, everyone tends to think that we are close buds, and maybe we are, in a way. But I'm just plain tired of her ditching me everytime a guy asks her out or she would just ditch me when she meets a guy-friend. Pisses me off there. And when she does that, everyone would look at me pityingly. I hate that! No need to look at me so pityingly man, I know I look pitiful. No need to rub it in already!Loneliness, my friend, is how it should be. Maybe that's why I feel closer with cf-ers than with my college friends. I can't seem to fit in anywhere it seems....